What would you do with a surprise day off?

What would you do if you suddenly had a day off?

Recently I had a full day meeting planned with peers but it was canceled because the host was sick. So I suddenly had a day off. Guess what I (and the others) did? Yep, catching up on work. Granted, I took things slower and stopped earlier but I didn’t take the day off.

There’s nothing wrong with catching up on work but ideally it should be a conscious choice, not automatic. For so many of us prioritizing work is a default state and when that’s the case it’s worth exploring the deeper layer. Chances are it’s a slippery slope downhill from there.

Because drifting away from who we truly are, what we need and want happens to most of us. It’s what happened to me, it’s what I see happen for the vast majority of people around me.

Staying true to yourself isn’t easy. Chances are you’ve lost part of yourself along the way too—likely with the best intentions from yourself and everyone around you. You can check the five signs you’ve lost touch with yourself here.

The cost of losing touch with yourself

Losing touch with yourself happens one step, one decision, one “yes” when you mean “no” at a time. And the problem isn’t just that you’re drifting away from yourself. The problem is that you lose touch with your body and what it needs. Making it easier to push through on willpower when your body has nothing left to give. Damaging your health and vitality.

The problem is that losing touch with your desires and doing things that don’t feel aligned erodes your happiness, your well-being, your peace of mind. I could go on and on.

The compounded stress of all those little moments of being out of sync adds up and puts a strain on your body. Until one day you wake up and you don’t recognize yourself—or your life. You feel lost and so disconnected from what you truly want that you’re not just miserable but likely need drastic measures to course correct.

I want you to catch yourself before a tough wake-up call forces you to make huge changes. The good news? Twenty plus years in this work showed me that once you’re ready to come home to yourself, things can shift much faster than you think.

What this looks like in real life

Here’s what happened for a client. After coming up against some issues in a project at work, a colleague suggested she could really benefit from my guidance.

When she came to me, she wanted support with her sensitivity and how to handle that, how to trust her intuition and heal some stuff from her past that was pretty intense. She wanted to know how to deal with people who are so completely different, who you don’t understand.

She could see that in order to be ready for a big promotion she was being considered for, she needed to work on herself and invest in her personal growth.

She’s a workaholic, high achiever, high performer who—like so many others—wasn’t taking enough time for herself.

In session 2 or 3 we joked “Be careful working with Iris, you may start enjoying your life!”

In session four everything changed

In session 4 she shared she had spontaneously taken a day off in the middle of the week. And used that day to go to a theme park with her kids. She even rescheduled meetings to make that possible.

She said “If you had told me this in session one, I would never have believed you.”

She quickly got to a place of understanding that prioritizing taking care of yourself is a valuable investment not only in your own health but also in productivity.

And she was really able to see the proof of that. She was so excited and couldn’t believe how good it felt.

When she changed, everyone benefited.

She even took it a step further and told her team why she was rescheduling: because she felt like it. It inspired her team to do something similar.

She’s running with the things we’re working on and sees the ripple effects both in her personal and professional life. She feels more confident in setting boundaries and communicating those clearly with the people involved—knowing both she and the company will benefit when she can excel.

Like when the CEO told her to focus on this extremely important and urgent project, rather than try to keep all the plates spinning and deplete herself (which used to be her default), she indicated which activities she would have to postpone in order to be able to ensure the quality of her work, and her own sanity.

As a result, everyone benefited.

The ripple effects were profound. She showed her kids they mattered more than productivity. She modeled how to prioritize joy and be spontaneous. She led with example for her team—setting healthy boundaries and prioritizing self-care. She demonstrated that aligned choices foster excellence instead of depletion. That’s how we change families, teams and organizations into healthy enjoyable places.

By being fully herself, she gave everyone around her permission to do the same. That’s how we make this world a better place for everyone.

My client’s transformation isn’t unique. It’s what happens when you commit to coming home to yourself.

Like what happened to Patrick. In his own words:

“2020 was a memorable year for me. Not because of COVID ’19 but because of my re-awakening, powered by Iris.

After forcefully working from home because of COVID after several years of continuous business travelling, my 10-year marriage ended 2 months later. Iris helped me to identify where I had lost myself over the previous years. She gave me practical tips and valuable insights to improve my life. This helped me to feel more grounded, mindful and balanced but also to look at the recent events with gratefulness and non-resistance as opposed to self-criticism and grief. In other words: to use both mindset and ‘heartset’.

I am personally very grateful to Iris and I would definitely recommend her to support you in your life including your career. I felt completely supported by Iris when I needed it most. If you team up with Iris as well, you’ll be surprised of the minimal amount of words Iris needs to coach you. She embodies her ‘sweet power flow’ we all need to embrace to live a happier life.”

This could be your transformation too

Here’s what I know: you didn’t lose yourself all at once. It happened slowly. A buildup of every time you pushed through when you were exhausted, every time you took care of someone else at your own expense, every time you ignored your intuition.

Because these changes happen so sneakily it’s easy to convince yourself it isn’t all that bad. But it is. Because every day you spend disconnected from yourself and what you want and need is a day you’re not fully alive. Not only do you deserve more than that. The world needs you at your best.

If you spend too much time working and not enough enjoying life and your loved ones. If you don’t feel entirely at home in your own skin. Or if you come up against a big life change that invites you to look at yourself and your situation with fresh eyes, then my upcoming online program ‘Come Home to Yourself’ is perfect for you. And no, it won’t add to your overwhelm. In fact, it’s designed to ease it.

This powerful program helps you reconnect with the parts of yourself that you’ve forgotten or lost touch with—so you can stop just getting through your days and start actually loving your life again. So you can lead your life with intention and joy. This program helps you prioritize what lights you up and engage with life from a state of flow rather than pushing through.

It’s a 6-week online program with powerful insights, guided exercises and direct access to me through live calls so you can reconnect with yourself step by step.

Ready to come home to yourself, increase your energy and happiness? Get first access when doors open—at an exclusive pre-sale price only available to waitlist members.

I’m limiting this program to just ten people because I want to walk this journey with you personally. This isn’t a course you’ll take alone—it’s a supported, intimate experience where you’ll get direct access to me as we work through this together. That’s why there are only ten spots. And that’s why they’ll fill fast.

You can register for the waitlist here.

Can’t wait that long? Check out my private mentoring program here.

Iris van Ooyen guides people home to themselves. As a life transformation mentor with 20+ years of experience, she offers hope with a compass—helping you find your way back to who you truly are when life’s demands have made you lose touch with yourself. She’s the author of Radiant: How to Have All the Energy You Need to Live a Life You Love. Contact Iris to come home to yourself—and love your life again. 

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