The biggest problem with relationships

March 11, 2015

irisenomaA friend of mine often says that people are in your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. And I totally agree. The problem arises in not recognizing it. (By the way, here you can see me and my grandmother, definitely a life-long relationship).

We often judge the quality of a relationship by its length.

A longer relationship is ‘better’ than a short one.

We believe we must have done something wrong when a relationship only has a short lifespan. And we usually attach all kinds of meaning to that. We often think we came up short somehow and then feel hurt, ‘not good enough’ and disappointed. And I am not just talking about romantic relationships!

We could make life so much easier if we would recognize that sometimes a relationship is not meant to go the distance. Whether this is with a lover, a friend or a business partner.

Sometimes we learn a lot from a short interaction. Or we simply enjoy the pleasure of hanging out together and then move on. Staying stuck in a relationship that has outlived its course is something that can weigh you down and cost a lot of energy.

Of course it is more difficult when one person feels the relationship is complete and the other still wants to hang on. We often take this personally and this can create a lot of drama and pain. This is where we are left with scar tissue.

The scar tissue is something you take with you into next relationships and we often accumulate scars over the course of our life. What we fail to recognize is the impact this has, not only on our relationships and the way we feel about ourselves (if you’re anything like me you’ve beaten yourself up at least once 😉 but also on our energy level and the flow we experience.

Scar tissue makes it harder to feel and recognize the love that is available around you.

I’ve seen this happen many times, and I have plenty of experience with this first-hand, and I know it is something to take seriously. There is no need to drag that outdated energy with you. If you want to shift and embrace more of who you truly are then my individual support might be for you.

Iris-van-Ooyen-04
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