Do you know the feeling
That something is wrong with you.
That even though people pretend they like you,
They can’t
Not truly
If they knew you.
But you know.
You know that deep inside something is off,
Is different.
YOU are different.
You’ve always known you weren’t quite normal.
Not like everyone else.
And even the ones who pretend they’re like you
They have no idea
They don’t know what you can do
What you feel
What you can’t help but feel
It hurts.
Knowing you’re different hurts.
All you want to do is fit in
Be normal
Be understood.
At times I found someone who understood
Or so I thought
Who was my friend
Who promised me it was okay.
That I am okay.
But no
Betrayal
Talking behind my back
Distance
A gaping abyss is my heart
Pain
So Much Pain
It hurts
It hurts so much I’m afraid it will never stop
Never ever stop
I cry
And savor a moment of release
A moment
Of being in control
Sort of
My emotions run wild
Run away
Leaving me behind
Everyone leaves me behind.
Away
I need to go away
Away from the pain
Master
I need to master the pain
Not feel so much
Too much
Overflowing with emotions
Too much love, too much pain, too much
I am too much
Too intense
Tone myself down
My entire life I’ve toned myself down
I don’t know how to stop
Toning myself down
I don’t know how to feel everything and stop resisting my own power
It breaks me
Trying to stay in control shatters me
I need to let it shatter me
Break me wide open
So open it hurts
The light
Too much light
Entering my life, my body, my soul
Flooded with light,
With love
Drowning out the pain, the hurt, the disappointment
Replacing the cracks, without obscuring them
Honoring them
Honoring the path, the journey, the steps I’ve taken
You’ve taken.
You’re okay
You’re more than okay
You’re perfect
Just the way you are
You only have to believe it yourself.
It’s always been there
Buried deep inside
Your mind, your heart, your soul
Deeply buried into your soul
Your spark
Your unique ray of light
Please let it shine
Bright
PS If you want to talk to someone who understands, who’s gone through the dark night of the soul. I’m here. Let’s turn this around so you can use your power for good.
